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I second Jersey City by SgtK

Good eateries, good bars, fun things to do. Look at the Grove Street or Hamilton Park area in Jersey City. If you can't afford those apartments, check out anything relatively close to Journal Square.

Maybe I am biased because the majority of the people I grew up with in Monmouth County live in Hoboken, and I will be moving to JC in May, but Hoboken is like one giant, horrible frat party.