Stage six alert
by Jvan (2011-09-14 10:37:25)
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The twelve stages of the ND Football cycle, as patented by NDNation.

1. We have a new coach. He's not whom we wanted but let's rally behind him because we cannot afford for him to fail.
Response: He'll be here for five years, so get on board.

2. I'm concerned about the Coordinators and some of the assistants on this staff. Why didn't Coach X pursue the best and brightest over cronyism?
Response: It's more important that a staff be able to work together than be a collection of superstars.

3. Geez, I really don't think too much of this offense. I suppose it's OK if it works, but it's too cute by half.
Response: Get with the 21st century. The metrics on this offense are really great.

4. How could we lose to such a low rent program? This is not a good sign.
Response: Ara, Holtz and Saban all had games like this. We can still qualify for the Horsebleep Bowl in Altoona if we win out.

5. How are we still losing games when we are obviously the more talented team? These guys were four star recruits!
Response: The coaches can't block and tackle for them, and the staff did not fumble the ball. Quit being so negative.

6. I think we have to consider the possibility that Coach X is not going to make it. He could turn things around but that needs to happen pretty soon.
Response: We must be snakebit, but have patience. Coach X is going to be here for three more years, so get over it. When it turns around, it will do so with a vengeance.

7. Damn, I really was hoping that Coach X would turn things around in his third season, especially with the brilliant changes he made in his staff and in his overall management approach.
Response: Those #*&%*^$&% referees ^%$*^&ed us again. Besides, recruiting is going well and we should be in position to compete for the national championship in a couple of years.

8. Uh-oh. We'd better get out the short list of candidates and start talking to them on the sly.
Response: We'll never get Coach Z to come here. Besides, we have to maintain continuity and Coach X has actually shown some improvement over the last few games if you look at the stats. I'm sticking with the lads on this one, you bandwagon bitches!

9. That's got to be the last straw. Even the ND Administration must see the writing on the wall now.
Response: A coaching change will hurt recruiting. All the current players were brought in for Coach X's system. We can't afford to start over.

10. New recruits are de-committing and we're getting ripped in the media. The AD had better be working on a solution.
Response: This is somewhat disturbing. Maybe Coach X won't make it. I don't understand it because he said all the right things when we hired him.

11. The AD just said he would evaluate Coach X at the end of the season. I sure hope he is interviewing top shelf coaches right now because we know where this is headed.
Response: I knew all along that Coach X was flawed. I posted about it four years ago but no one picked up on it.

12. Geez, we had better not hire that flash in the pan from Podunk U. Who the hell is accountable for the hiring process?
Response: Coach Q is really a good candidate, and he's the best we're going to get at this point. He's an innovator and a management guru with tremendous upside.


Bridget don't worry about the black spots on the potatoes!
by fenwick76  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

A true shanty Irishman is hopelessly in denial until the inexorably bitter end.


Will Adais be selling Horsebleep Bowl throwback jerseys? *
by NW Ohio Irish  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


You can't patent
by Art Fern  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

FLD's biography.


I remember stage one very differently.
by baloo88  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     cannot delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

1)




Response:


You've only been around for one coaching search
by Jvan  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     cannot delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

We've done this several times in the last 15 years, sonny.


Fair enough. I was a lurker during the 2005 search.
by baloo88  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     cannot delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

I do recall that the decision to hire Weis was not nearly as divisive as the Kelly hiring.


It was still a doozy by any objective standard *
by Jvan  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     cannot delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


With or without the tracking of private jets?
by sluredandstumbly  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

Nonetheless, great effort, sir.


Revised response to #6
by Dwight Schrute  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

We may be losing some games right now, but the important thing is that Coach is building a PROGRAM. You have to think long term, so stop being fooled by a few fluke losses, and get on the bandwagon.


Better nail this to the doors of the Basilica *
by The Cone of Silence  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


I'd say we're at def con 4. *
by Thunderlips  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


can we all sway together now?
by 84david  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     cannot delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

i feel like swaying.


I'm very concerned
by Denver Jim  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     cannot delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

that sparty may disrespect the alma mater.


Kelly's undefeated in bowl games at ND
by abqgant  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

MSU 38

ND 24

It's not going to get better.


Done. *
by OGerry  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


Anywhere between 6 and 10 is justifiable
by 2001sorin  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

but I wish we were at 11.....


Focus on why #8 is true.
by AFA91  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

The top coaches can sense that the institution is not truly committed to winning in football. They can sense that this institution's leadership can't handle the truth of what it takes to win in a game like football. Sure, they'll throw money at the problem all the live-long day, but they are so deathly afraid of anything that might tarnish ND's pristine image, that a real football coach is simply out of the question.

If leadership had the right mentality, the nation's best coaches would immediately sense it, and they would fight over each other to coach here. As it is, they would not consider taking this job, with all of its dress-wearing prerequisites.

That post was a magnificent masterpiece, BTW.


Wash, rinse, repeat. *
by The_Phoenix  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


Jvan is the Messiah!
by Tug101  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

I should know i've followed a few.


Post of The Year
by Corky  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

*


I can't wait until we start referring to football games
by ugoirish  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

as 'data points.' The death throes are so much freaking fun.

That was one of the best things you've ever written, probably the best thing.


Best thing I've ever read on this board. *
by ndtiger  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     cannot delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


You forgot, "We can't afford to start paying
by jej  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     cannot delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

another ex-coach"


Oh, there are plenty more he could have inserted in there
by Chuck84  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     cannot delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

Somewhere in 11.5, two more responses could go in:

"Why don't we hire Ed Schtookie of NC A&T? His team is kicking ass on Thursday Night ESPN."

"Get Real!! Why would {Name of A-Lister} come to ND!"


We don't watch enough ESPN to know that, Chuck. *
by Howard Roark  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


Perhaps you forgot about this. (link)
by Inspectorclouseau  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     cannot delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


Board, not site. *
by ndtiger  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


This board needs a psychologist, stat! *
by God-Country-ND  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


12 stages? Kubler-Ross only had 5.
by IrishCavan  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     cannot delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

I can't seem to get past stage 4 (depression).


He's appealing to our irish tendencies. *
by 2001sorin  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


Me too.
by mkovac  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

I keep bouncing around between anger, bargaining, and denial:

Kubler-Ross 5 Stages of Grief

1. Denial

2. Anger

3. Bargaining

4. Depression

5. Acceptance


I'm still laughing...Is this therapeutic? ** *
by IrishOB  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


Your best work, ever *
by MukIrish  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


When do we get to consult with Bill Belichick?
by SWPaDem  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     cannot delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

Or Linda?


So that's what stack overflow means. *
by Lloyd Braun  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


Those can't be real. *
by LocalSubAlum  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     cannot delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


It's the thought that counts. *
by SWPaDem  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


Who cares? ......
by gadomer  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     cannot delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

They're spectacular!


Oh, I don't care, they look good. Just sayin' *
by LocalSubAlum  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


I'll bet she's really smart *
by abqgant  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     cannot delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


I'll bet she can't dunk, though.
by SWPaDem  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     cannot delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

Or sink.


Man Overboard! Quick someone throw him Belichick's wife! *
by abqgant  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


The roundabouts by the airport aren't that big *
by SB Jimbo  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


Hi, I'm Korzo78
by korzo78  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

I've been addicted since since ...... I don't know when. I tried but have never been able to break free and get clean. I am even expecting (maybe hoping is more accurate) that the Irish will win on Saturday and Kelly will turn things around.

If not ...... maybe, we can finally get Gruden ...or Saban. This time, the administration will get it right.


"the lads"
by emd811  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

Makes me laugh every single time.


Well, you guys can shut down the board permanently now.
by Bacchus  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

Looks like you've covered it.


say, did you get the memo on the TPS reports? *
by jt  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


Can we color code this? I can't follow numbers, only colors *
by Tommy Baseball  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     cannot delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


The board background could change with the stage we are in. *
by tnirishfan  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     cannot delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


Perhaps we could find pictures of people that go with each
by HennaorNo  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

stage. Like when the doctor tells my four year old to point at the face that shows how much pain he's in.


How sure are you we aren't at Stage 8? *
by captaineclectic  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


I've never been to Altoona. *
by irishhawk49  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     cannot delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


Altoona,
by IrishOB  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     cannot delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

Iowa is home to Adventureland and Prairie Meadows Horsetrack and Casino, so although harsh, probably appropriate. Nonetheless, my kids love Adventureland.


Is there more than one Altoona? PA blows *
by fenwick76  (2011-09-14 10:37:25)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


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