For some odd reason, I have no idea why, I thought it was you all along.

The chest hair story! I forgot about that, a classic.

Another Gooniefucker story - Dick and Ernie told him that if he slapped his hand on top of a full bottle of Coke that the bottom of the Coke bottle would come off. They told him to try it over the sink, so the Coke wouldn't get all over the floor. Legendary dumbshit that he was, he tried it, the bottle went through his hand and it crashed through the sink, leaving a huge hole.

Dick told me once that the entire time he lived with him, he never once saw Gooniefucker brush his teeth.