September 29, 2017. South Bend, Indiana. Rocco's Pizza.
by Bruno95 (2017-01-11 15:59:23)
Edited on 2017-01-11 16:35:25
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A 2008 Dodge Caravan backs into its spot. Out pile SimplyIrish, wife, and kids. Both adults are wearing tennis shoes with jeans. He in Shamrock Series jersey, she in marked-down Adidas ND gear she received for Christmas. This year. They're seated right away, for his dream scenario is coming to fruition. "Gimme seven watahs." "I'm sorry?" "Watahs. We're from Boston." With that, an extra topping (pubic hair) is on the house.

He overcomes the disappointment that they noticed the Groupon expired, but it's still worth somethin'. They get a couple pies, eat more than human people should, and saunter out. $50. $52 after tip.

Back to the B&B that asked them to stop bringing the kids, for an early night's sleep. They'll be waking up to the Victory March, contrary to another polite request, applying that first round of sunscreen, then making off for the Bookstore. SimplyIrish has been filling out surveys for money, and he's got a prepaid Visa card that's about to buy a red ND sideline hat. Just like BVG's kid wears.

Lunch will be burned burgers, same as Mom's (that's what he calls his wife, even when SimplestIrish is poking through the jammy pants). Hustle to the player walk, where he is nearly tased for trying to touch a visiting three-star recruit. "That kid's 40 pounds away from putting a hand on the ground! Elko's gonna coach you up, boy!" Someone reminds him that "boy" is discouraged nomenclature.

To the game, where, despite shithousing two cans of Meijer-brand SPF 50, they all burn like they were kidnapped by Mox-Mox. Notre Dame loses, no one cares, he meets friends who don't happen to have their business cards on them, and they finally catch the shuttle back to the White Lot. Where the Caravan awaits.

Godspeed, man who likes things that are not good. Enjoy your time in the Bend.


oh that's good, you forgot about the part with the selfie
by ColoNDFan  (2017-01-12 12:17:36)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

with said three-star recruit, which he promptly facebook posted and tweeted.


Bravo! Bravo! *
by JoyceSouthGater  (2017-01-12 09:55:07)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


Tennis shoes with jeans. *
by Goldhelmethead  (2017-01-12 07:50:27)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


Backs into spot.
by DCDave  (2017-01-12 07:42:38)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

I'm laughing already.


Who or what is a Mox Mox? *
by Wooderson  (2017-01-11 17:54:44)     cannot delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


The Streets of Laredo.
by jakam31  (2017-01-11 21:56:38)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

He was the guy who burned his victims alive.


I'm insulted
by NDColt  (2017-01-11 17:39:28)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

I tip at least $5 on a $50 tab.


Rocco's Pizza is what made it realistic.
by DillonFightSong  (2017-01-11 17:20:29)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

Had he gone with Applebee's (which is probably where he'll end up regardless), it would've been a dead giveaway that he was trolling.


No Pep Rally? *
by HennaOrNo  (2017-01-11 17:19:59)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


When they get home, his wife scolds him for gawking
by miamioh_irishfan  (2017-01-11 17:19:39)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

At all the visiting Oxford coeds who came to campus for the weekend.

That'll be a sex free month for you sir.


Check please. *
by The Holtz Room  (2017-01-11 16:52:48)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


If I ever get on your bad side, I preemptively and ...
by GeronimoRumplestiltskin  (2017-01-11 16:46:52)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

... profusely apologize.


Surely they collect used commemorative cups. *
by NDMike2001  (2017-01-11 16:41:52)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


Damn you're good.
by John88  (2017-01-11 16:29:04)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

September 29th?


You forgot about when stops to check his smart phone
by Maud-Dib  (2017-01-11 16:26:46)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

to see if any of the players he sent a facebook friend request to a month ago have "friend-ed" him back yet.


Small nit: his bio says he's from or at least lives in CT *
by celtic745  (2017-01-11 16:24:54)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


You forgot about the ass stinking post game Mass *
by ACross  (2017-01-11 16:23:15)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


Soul crushing *
by Tonybullets  (2017-01-11 16:22:18)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


you know, right around the time Davie started to fail
by jt  (2017-01-11 16:21:45)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

there was a poster that went by the handle "JustIrish" that used to post here and at UHND that would post similar thoughts in support of the coach and admin that we see below. I haven't really seen the handle in a long time but I wonder if it is the same guy and I wonder if it's the same act.


Remind me never to piss you off *
by eddysorin  (2017-01-11 16:14:36)     cannot delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


No shit
by HTownND  (2017-01-11 16:40:06)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

Just savage


That's Grand Caravan, buddy *
by rick  (2017-01-11 16:10:15)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


I'll bet someone regrets hitting the
by ugoirish  (2017-01-11 16:07:36)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post

'post message' button and it isn't Bruno (for a change).


Savage. Full approval. *
by navyjoe  (2017-01-11 16:01:28)     Delete  |  Edit  |  Return to Board  |  Ignore Poster   |   Highlight Poster  |   Reply to Post


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